What gives you direction in life?

For the longest time, “the pursuit of happiness” has been my compass. What equated to “happiness”, exactly, depended on where I was in my life. Happiness looked like a lot of different things over the years.

I chased love over counties, countries, and sometimes continents, all in the pursuit of happiness. I set extremely high goals on the work front. I busted my ass in a predominately male career field, with a “work hard, play hard” mentality. The sense of accomplishment with every step up the ladder motivated me to continuously do better and be more. Money was a huge motivator as well. I hated the feeling of living paycheck to paycheck, not eating so I could ensure my daughter was fed and we had heat and water. For a very long time, happiness also looked like living life to the fullest, a.k.a., partying. I’ve been drunk in more countries than the average person. I have danced my ass off in bars, clubs, and raves. I took risks, a lot of them. All in the name and pursuit of happiness.

A little older and a little wiser, today I am guided mainly by my intuition. Not being constantly submerged in a bottle of wine enhances and clarifies those intuitive thoughts and makes you want to stand up and listen. I’m still very much a goal-oriented gal, but have become a little less hyper-focused on the outcome of “happiness” and more on the journey. If something doesn’t feel right, I don’t pursue, no matter how much “success” or “happiness” it foretells.

And of course, my kids have been a beacon of light throughout the years.

I’m not saying that I’ve always been a good Mama. I’ve done some pretty dumb shit. I’ve had to work through my own demons and break generational cycles. As I grow and learn, however, showing my kids how to do good and be a good person gives me direction in life.

Stand up for those who are afraid to use their voice. Be respectful, to yourself and others. If you are going to do something, do it all the way – no “half-assery”. Hold the door open for strangers. Weigh the consequences, but take chances. Give at least one compliment to someone each day. Be truthful. Create, and use your brain. Be kind – you never know what someone is going through. Share. Listen to your gut. Be grateful.

“Your greatest contribution to the universe might not be something you do, but someone you raise”.