Oh boy, today’s prompt is right up my prepper alley….

Each of my family’s emergency preparedness plans all start with the same goal in mind – get everyone back to home base. In the event of a natural disaster or alien invasion, my oldest son has been instructed to leave his school, pick up his sister from her school, and head immediately home. If he is unable to drive, he has been directed to stand down and wait for his dad or I to pick both kids up via the 1955 Chevy or bicycle, if necessary.

Once everyone is home safe, we assess the situation:

• Chemical or biological attack imminent? We immediately fill bathtubs and other available vessels with as much water as possible. We use the rolls of Visqueen and duct tape stored in the basement to tape off windows and doors and shelter in place. We take an inventory of food stores, medicines, and ammunition, and prepare a ration schedule in the event it takes a while before we get an all clear. We then shoot both dogs, as they are lazy, worthless, and non-contributing. Kidding. They will be put outside as indicators, our canaries in the coal mines, if you will.
• Was an Electromagnetic Pulse (EMP) deployed overhead, disabling all electrical/electronic devices? Due to the loss of power our first task will be to deal with food in the refrigerators and freezers. Anything that can be canned, will be. Again, we will inventory and prepare a ration schedule. Using beeswax from my hives we will pour candles, we’ll collect firewood from the woods around our house, start seedlings indoors, and prepare for the long haul. Most importantly, however, is protection. We will establish a perimeter and guard duty schedule. Shoot first, ask questions second. The dogs will both become outdoor animals and will be required to contribute as alarms for anyone attempting to access our property. After about two months, when the majority of the population dies off because we live in a society of out of shape and heavily medicated Americans, we will fire up the ’55 and head into town, seeing where we can assist, trade, or help rebuild.
• Zombie attack? Weapons check is number one. Everyone will be required to carry a weapon at all times, even the baby. Doors and windows will be boarded up and we will defend our property at all costs. We will have daily zombie killing training to keep our skills sharp. Food, ammunition, water, check. If we have to bug out, the RV is fueled and ready to go.

And then you have the “normal” emergencies – fires, tornadoes, earthquakes, blah, blah, blah. We have fireboxes for valuables, tornado kits in the backroom downstairs, and each family member has been given strict instructions on how to escape and where our rendezvous point is. No SquishMallows, no XBoxes, everything gets left behind. Except Hades, God of the Underworld (a.k.a, Mr. Cat). Someone better grab my cat. Although, I can see him being the first one to the designated meeting place.