Do you know when you have one person going into the restroom at the same time another person is leaving, both exerting the same amount of force to open the door, but it not being enough power to hint that there is someone on the other side of the door, causing both parties involved to get the royal shit scared out of them?
Well, it happened to me this morning, only the lady walking into the restroom was wearing latex gloves. As we were laughing about our mutual scare and each apologizing profusely for being such a rat-bastard alarmist, she touched my bare arm with her gloved hand!
Sitting at my desk, my mind is racing – WHY WAS SHE WEARING LATEX GLOVES?!
Was she wearing gloves into the restroom because she didn’t want to contract something inside the restroom? What does she know?! Should I hunt this woman down and demand her tell me who/what she is so afraid of in this building that she feels it necessary to don gloves before using the restroom?
Was she wearing the gloves while performing her job, but forgot to pull them off before using the facilities? What is her profession and why is it necessary to wear latex gloves during the performance of said occupation? What does she handle? Food, microorganisms, fecal matter?!
Was she wearing the gloves to protect others from something that she has contracted?! Have the integrity of said gloves been compromised in any way since she put them on? A rip? A tear? A minute pin-prick allowing a minuscule infectious disease spore to escape through the puncture? Is this how the zombie apocalypse will begin?!
I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!! Time to go hunt down an anti-bacterial wipe and swab my arm!!